On January 3rd, 2008, I tapped out an entry that delineated some goals I had for the year 2008. Now that the year is ending, I can say with confidence that I have eaten “more” vegetables this year (particularly after I moved to New York, which was an unexpected development). However, I did not write and send “more” handwritten letters, though I did have a brief pen pal thing going with a fellow blogger in Australia. I enjoyed that.

I have also resumed reading The Gift; I didn’t read it for perhaps the middle nine months of the year!

This morning, I ran four miles as the sun was rising and, during the course of that run, accomplished my goal of running 1000 kilometers (621 miles) in 2008. Though the morning was brisk (a nippy 28 degrees with a biting windchill down to 22 degrees), I felt the warm glow of success as I came to a gentle halt. (Perhaps that warm glow was really just the heat accumulating in my hat.)

Running has changed my life. Yes, that sounds dramatic and exaggerated, but running has truly changed the way I live.

The day before I formally committed to running, I had explained my previous aversion and renewed interest to the activity. About six months later, I tapped out another entry about the benefits I had noticed from regular running. Now, I’ve been running regularly for about a year and a half.

Since moving to New York, my running routine has shifted. I no longer run in the morning because I’d have to get up before 5:00am to allocate enough time for it and while I am a “morning person”, I’m not that much of a morning person. And though New York City has a low crime rate, I don’t think it is prudent for me to go running alone at that time of day. Thus, I now join the crew of runners who hits the streets after work.

Running has taught me discipline.

“But, hey,” you may wonder. “Doesn’t it take discipline to get through medical school and residency? And now you’re doing a fellowship? Um, wouldn’t you say that maybe you’ve got, uh, too much discipline?”

Well, sort of. We all can exercise fantastic, unbelievable discipline for various tasks in unique contexts. Think of all the guys in college who spend hours playing video and computer games. That’s discipline. (It could be avoidance of schoolwork, sure, but that amount of dedication to the game counts for something.) Or think of the people who go on multiple dates per week or attend a bazillion social functions. That requires discipline, too. I personally lack discipline for both of those scenarios.

Running on a regular basis entails running when it is dark, muggy, humid, cold, hot, rainy, snowy, windy, crowded, or empty outside. It means adding another item to the weekly agenda that takes time away from doing something else (playing video games or attending social functions?). It means running when you’re feeling tired, hungry, annoyed, sad, irritable, and demoralized—emotions that seem much more compatible with muttering, “Screw it!” and munching on cookies.

Of all the days I ran this year, there have been perhaps only one or two when, afterwards, I thought the run was not worth the time and effort. Usually (almost always), I feel physically more relaxed and mentally more clear after I run. I also feel a sense of accomplishment, which lifts my mood. I have also enjoyed tracking the miles I have run towards my arbitrary goal of 1000 kilometers.

This does not mean, however, that I actually remembered the warm fuzzy feelings that happen post-run every single time I laced up my shoes to go out. More often than not, I balked:

• “I’m tired. I’m just gonna feel more tired when I’m done. And I’ve got work to do.”
• “I’m hungry. I’ll feel better if I eat rather than run.”
• “I can run tomorrow. It’s not like I have to do this today.”
• “I haven’t seen So-and-So in a while; maybe I should call her up and go out for dinner. That’ll be more fun.”
• “Why am I doing this again???”

But that’s where the discipline and commitment comes in. I can’t run 621 miles in a week. The only way I could possibly achieve this goal is to do a little each day, which adds up to a bit each week, which sums to a good amount each month, which then results in running 1000 kilometers in a year. (!)

Running has also highlighted the therapeutic effects of physical exercise for mental well-being.

During the last half of my residency, I saw a psychiatrist on a weekly basis for psychotherapy (as is encouraged in most training programs). While I can’t say that I necessarily enjoyed it (talking about stuff you don’t want to talk about though you know it helps to talk about it isn’t easy!), I absolutely found it helpful. I learned a lot about myself, personal biases and assumptions I hadn’t recognized before, and how I interact with the world at large. Furthermore, I’d like to think that it has helped me to become a better psychiatrist.

To be clear, though, I do not believe that one needs to be in psychotherapy to learn about oneself, personal biases and assumptions, and how one interacts with the world. Different people have different ways of learning about themselves; some people achieve this through meditation, others yoga. Some people go through this process with friends and family; other people write or create visual art. Some people cook; some people sit in the park and watch people.

Maybe because running engages the entire body and involves regular, repetitive movements, it gives the mind a lot of space to wander or focus. There have been days when I honestly could not remember what happened during my run; I only recalled that I started and before I knew it, I was done. I also could not remember what I had thought about during that time. Sometimes, that kind of dissociation is nice. It’s a mental vacation.

Other times, I have spent entire runs contemplating specific things: interactions that had occurred earlier in the day; plans for upcoming events; conversations that piqued my curiosity for whatever reason; career decisions; blog posts; financial matters; recipes; whatever. Sometimes, quiet epiphanies graced me and I felt that I had greater understanding about how to proceed. Sometimes, I realized that I had overlooked something or recognized further complications. Sometimes, I came to the conclusion that thinking about the issue any further would not change anything, so why waste the time and energy?

Many times, running did (does) become a kind of mindfulness meditation: I focus on my inhalations and exhalations… and then my mind will wander onto some other topic… and then I bring my attention back to my breathing… and then my mind floats onto something else. And then I try to take note of what distracted me… only to get distracted again.

Has running resulted in personal enlightenment? Absolutely not. Do I benefit from the time running gives me to mull over stuff (or to check out)? Yes.

Lastly, running has changed the way I look. Forgive my vanity, but I shan’t always have this youthful appearance and there is little doubt that running has helped me attain and maintain that.

I’ve lost quite a bit of weight (like 15 pounds!) since I moved to New York. Part of this may be due to the fact that I walk around more than I did in Seattle; part of this may be due to my improved eating habits (which is really a function of not having a lot of money, not because I was/am trying to eat more fruits, veggies, etc.). I have run farther distances on a regular basis since I have relocated, though, and that has undoubtedly contributed to my weight loss. (Unfortunately, however, my pants really don’t fit anymore and I really should go out and buy better-fitting pants; my pocketbook, though, has also lost a lot of weight since I’ve moved to New York.) This is probably the best my body has ever looked in my life.

And this weight loss isn’t the kind of weight loss that results in that stickish appearance that some models have. I’ve still got meat on my bones and tone in my muscles. I think an appropriate adjective is “trim”. Running results in weight loss. Running makes people look trim. Of course, we’d all like to look trim without having to do any work, but if you run regularly (which, make no mistake, can be work), you will look trim over time.

There’s also all the other little perks that come with running: the thrill of running a race (through Central Park!) and the free schwag that comes with those events; recognizing that you’re running at faster paces as time passes; connecting with other runners and sharing the fears and joys that come with running various distances; the pleasure that comes from surmounting goals (running a half marathon, running 1000 kilometers in a year); running skirts (I now own one—from Target!); and eating a lot of fatty food (burgers, ice cream, etc.) after a race because you indulge in the belief that you “deserve” it.

I do recommend running to everyone (insert usual clause here about how you should see your medical doctor first in the event that there is something going on with your physical health that would make running a bad idea). It’s a fantastic and (generally) fun activity that allows you to invest in yourself and the rewards are handsome. It won’t change your life the ways winning the lottery or getting married or moving across country do, but it does result improve quality of life, often it ways that you have no way of anticipating.